Wednesday, August 28, 2024

Robert the Telepathic Gila Monster is going to Bhutan!

"You never know what will happen next" is actually true these days. For instance, I didn't know that Robert the Telepathic Gila Monster, who keeps me grounded in my self-imposed exile, would, last night, clamor to my door as agitated as I've ever seen him, though in an oddly optimistic way. "Doug's going to Bhutan!" he buzzed through the airways (he was referring to my altered-ego Doug, author of Lasken's Log at https://laskenlog.blogspot.com/). Sitting in the confines of my living room, Robert relaxed and explained:

Robert: D.L. and his wife are going to Bhutan in December!

Me: That's nice.

Robert: Do you even know where Bhutan is?

Me: Yes, it's 10,000 feet up, surrounded by China, Tibet, India, Nepal, Bangladesh, Southeast Asia and the rest of the world.

Robert: What else?

Me: What else what?

Robert: What else is special about Bhutan?

Me: You tell me.

Robert: Will do. When Buddhism came to Bhutan it did not conquer. It was slowly and peacefully adopted, and often the locals retained original gods of the region in their versions of Buddhism.

Me: Oh yeah? Like which gods?

Robert: Some heavy-duty gods that roamed the Earth until they were inhibited by modern times. For a while it seemed they were gone, but they quietly reappeared in Bhutan.

Me: What are these gods like? Do they have names?

Robert: They are referred to collectively as the "Tsen." They influence various things. Yulha and Zhidak are territorial, often protecting open grassland or forests. The Lu are water deities, watching over rivers and lakes. The Chenrezig are personal spirits that protect homes or villages.

Me: Will Doug and his wife give offerings to the Tsen?

Robert: I couldn't tell you. The only god of the Tsen I care about is InsertHere, one of the Zhidag, the mountain deities. Often the Zhidag are attached to volcanoes, but Bhutan sits on tectonically squished, impervious rock so there are no volcanoes. InsertHere is the deity of Gangkhar Puensum, the highest peak in Bhutan, towering 14,000 feet over the already 10,000 foot elevated Bhutanese plain.

Me: Ok, it sounds interesting, I guess....

Robert: Listen to me, Harry, InsertHere is the cousin of our own Tab B!

Me: Who?

Robert: Tab B, the deity of Funeral Peak, in the Black Mountains outside Death Valley.

Me: What kind of name is "Tab B" for a mountain deity? For that matter, what kind of name is "InsertHere"?

Robert: Those are not their original names. No one knows what those were. Modern explorers slept at the foot of these peaks and had strange dreams, sometimes waking up mumbling gibberish. The names were derived from the gibberish, for better or worse. Anyway, Tab B is a major telepathic force in the western deserts. Gilas commune with him all the time, which is why I intend to travel to Bhutan with Doug.

Me: What!?

Robert: It was Tab B's idea. He's somewhat estranged from his cousin and wants me to contact InsertHere and compare notes on what's happening in the world, human and otherwise.

Me: You're going to need a god's help to figure this out. How will you get past airport security, not to mention Doug's wife?

Robert: With help from a deity, you'd be surprised what you can do.

Me: I don't suppose you've run this by Doug.

Robert: He's processing it.

Me: I bet.

Stay tuned! Doug and Robert will be posting updates as December approaches.
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