Three entries from the upcoming book, "Robert the Telepathic Gila Monster's favorite jokes":
1. Once there was a king who was not a megalomaniac. He worried: "How can I know what to do if I'm not a megalomaniac?"
2. The Earth felt cold and neglected. The Moon said, "You dummy! Look at the sun. Do you see it complaining?"
3. The cat said: "I am at the top of the food chain. Humans serve me because I am far more beautiful than any human could be." The dog hated that and barked at her.